Saturday, April 16, 2011

Lost Soul

he fabricates the illusion
that he is in control
building it up with an adamant
will devoid of imagination

what he cannot see in himself
is clearly evident to me
and what is tragic is that
it is not peculiar but commonplace

* * * * *

This poem was written in response to two prompts at Three Word Wednesday, one using adamant, fabricate, and peculiar, and one using evident, illusion, and tragic.

13 comments:

  1. All too common indeed. Excellent use of the three words.

    I also did Three Word Wednesday

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  2. Mr. Walker, how right you are, it is tragic. Excellent use of the words.

    Pamela

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  3. Carl, this was indeed an excellent use of the prompt. Was wondering (if you don't mind my saying) whether you considered putting the word "will" back up with the line before for a clearer read?

    The whole subject of lost souls... it's true, their name is Legion, and they don't know it. It's one of those ping-pong issues that I consider often. Thanks for a really good poem, sir. Amy
    http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/04/17/mmmmmmmms-abc-day-16/

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  4. Alice, thank you for stopping by and the kind words.

    Pamela, glad you liked it.

    Amy, I will consider that. I wanted to draw attention to both "adamant" and "will", but I agree with you that it could read more clearly. I think that's what makes them truly lost, that they don't even know there's a problem. (Who's Carl? It's Richard. I don't mind. I have a habit of picking up nicknames.)

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  5. Great job combining the two sets of 3WW prompts. I love the challenge of combining prompts! :)

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  6. Paula, thank you. I was stumped by the first three, but then when I had all six, something came to me.

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  7. A brilliant pen portrait: he comes to life. I see him clearly.

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  8. Oh. to see ourselves as others see us... LOL

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  9. Dave, thank you. I'm glad that you could see him so clearly.

    Jinksy, thank you. I think things would be different if we could see ourselves that way.

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  10. Fear Not the Darkness, thanks for stopping by and for the kind words.

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  11. Great subject matter and well render for thoughtful discussion.

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  12. honeyhaiku, thank you. I think this one hints at a lot of possibilities, what people read into it, so I think it would lead to some interesting discussions.

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