tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post2842921555750938334..comments2023-08-16T08:30:19.873-07:00Comments on Sadly Waiting for Recess: Still Life on BalconyMr. Walkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16125024096735394592noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-89396738095915034472011-04-03T20:16:28.787-07:002011-04-03T20:16:28.787-07:00SweetTalkingGuy, thank you. I struggled for a whil...SweetTalkingGuy, thank you. I struggled for a while with who it would be with me on the balcony.Mr. Walkerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05507517064398624652noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-63471064987688812332011-04-03T15:54:31.326-07:002011-04-03T15:54:31.326-07:00I really like the way you got your head around thi...I really like the way you got your head around this prompt and produced a beauty!Andy Sewinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10023449074796269533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-43525550124595822072011-04-02T19:10:18.054-07:002011-04-02T19:10:18.054-07:00Ron, I hadn't thought about how many rhetorica...Ron, I hadn't thought about how many rhetorical questions there are here. I'm glad it's not too much, that it doesn't distract from the flow of the poem.<br />Tilly, no, it's not true, just responding to the prompt. But I definitely identified with Armstrong when I read about him.<br />Pamela, thanks. I'm going to have to try more of these narrative poems.Mr. Walkerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05507517064398624652noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-90160967903612751282011-04-02T17:49:24.913-07:002011-04-02T17:49:24.913-07:00Well written narrative piece, Mr. Walker.
PamelaWell written narrative piece, Mr. Walker.<br /><br />Pamelaflauberthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18424439866515694972noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-37662931886851511182011-04-02T15:44:14.777-07:002011-04-02T15:44:14.777-07:00I liked the Pavlov line too. Is this a true story...I liked the Pavlov line too. Is this a true story? It feels real. I love that the narrator put himself in Armstrong's shoes.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-45597290076376603292011-04-02T15:25:23.124-07:002011-04-02T15:25:23.124-07:00Very well-realized. Usually, poems with this many...Very well-realized. Usually, poems with this many rhetorical questions tuen me off, but not here. Good stuff.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-46387682723660509222011-04-02T15:24:45.710-07:002011-04-02T15:24:45.710-07:00Marianne, thank you. I've been leaning more to...Marianne, thank you. I've been leaning more towards the narrative lately, away from the lyric. I liked your balcony poem; thanks for reading mine.<br />Viv, thank you. I think you too noticed the narrative voice that has crept into my poems lately. Glad you liked that line; I almost cut it.<br />Amy, thank you for your kind words. Okay, the Pavlov line stays in. And I'm glad you think the ending works; I was worried about how to end this one.Mr. Walkerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05507517064398624652noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-44359411277321587392011-04-02T14:33:32.185-07:002011-04-02T14:33:32.185-07:00Mr. W: Found you had posted at Writer's Islan...Mr. W: Found you had posted at Writer's Island, too. I loved this. That thought-upon-thought of "Should I approach, or will he think I'm intruding?" The details about what his fellow astronauts thought about him were a nice touch.<br /><br />Ending up with musing on the proximity of the moon, lovely. And I, like Viv, really loved the Pavlov line. Nice work all around. <br /><br />Here's my April 2:<br />http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/04/02/the-revolving-balance/<br /><br />Peace, AmyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-76771324687137282422011-04-02T13:31:37.804-07:002011-04-02T13:31:37.804-07:00This prose poem has the feeling of a true story, a...This prose poem has the feeling of a true story, all the more effective for being simply written. It kept my attention throughout, and I particularly liked the line: Pavlovian dogs responding to the chime,vivinfrancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07388722600118753457noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24017814.post-5040443381410089102011-04-02T12:03:09.043-07:002011-04-02T12:03:09.043-07:00What an entertaining narrative poem! I love your s...What an entertaining narrative poem! I love your story about the moon and the man (Neil Armstrong?). It's clever and fresh.<br /><br />And thank you for commenting on my poem!Mariannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17734900426632493796noreply@blogger.com